


I will not kiss you

by strawbearii



Series: Haikyuu ship angst [1]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Blood, Hospitals, Hurt/Comfort, I'm Sorry, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-10
Updated: 2020-11-10
Packaged: 2021-03-09 04:21:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,065
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27488764
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/strawbearii/pseuds/strawbearii
Summary: Listen to Cancer (the twenty-one pilots cover)
Relationships: Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou
Series: Haikyuu ship angst [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2008609
Comments: 1
Kudos: 5





	I will not kiss you

**Author's Note:**

> Listen to Cancer (the twenty-one pilots cover)

_Turn away_

"Akaashi, why do you always insist on me looking away?" Bokuto asks, curious as ever, "No reason Bokuto-san, just makes me uncomfortable" he tries to speak with no shake in his voice. Akaashi slowly looks at the mirror taking in the view; pale skin, dark bags, being skinner than he last checked, and it had him tear up at how pathetic he looked. He slips on an oversized hoodie, one of Bokuto's as he turns to face Bokuto, "Alright Bokuto-san, you can look now" he speaks at a low volume, as Bokuto turns to face him with a gleam in his eyes. "Great! Let us go watch that movie now!"

_If you could get me a drink, Of water 'cause my lips are chapped and faded_

Akaashi during practice one day starts coughing, blood seeping into his hand. "AKAASHI! Are you okay?" Bokuto yells as he makes his way from across the court, "Yeah I'm fine Bokuto-san, just some allergies." as he coughs some more into his hand. Bokuto goes over to his bag and grabs his water bottle, "Here, are you sure you're okay Akaashi?" Bokuto says as Akaashi takes a sip of water, realizing his bloody hand, "Yes, I'm sure" he hurriedly hands Bokuto back the water and rushes to the washroom. He rushes over to the sinks immediately spitting up the blood left In his mouth and looks in the mirror to see the mess he had become.

_Help her gather all my things, And bury me in all my favorite colours_

"AKAASHI!" Bokuto yells, running up the stairs to Akaashi's room, "Akaashi?" Bokuto repeats, confused why there was no answer. He opens the door to the room and looks around, only to see a lump in the middle of the floor, "Akaashi!" Bokuto yells, running over to the lump. "Wake up!" he tries to shake him awake, "Akaashi this isn't funny!" he says as he starts to become more concerned for his friend, he decides to call 119, cradling Akaashi's head in his lap. "You'll be okay" Bokuto whispers as tears stream down his face, he hears sirens in the distance, "Please be okay" he whispers again, resting his forehead to Akaashi's.

_I will not kiss you, Cause the hardest part of this,_

"Why didn't you tell me Akaashi," Bokuto says to the now awake Akaashi, "I thought you'd leave me" he admits quietly. Bokuto just stares at him, then Akaashi feels a warm hand on his hand, "I would never leave you Akaashi" and sits up to kiss Akaashi on the head. Akaashi smiles, a genuine smile, for the first time since this all started "Thank you, Bokuto-san."

_is leaving you._

It's hard some days, good others. Bokuto visits Akaashi every day in the hospital, the doctors have yet to say what exactly was wrong with him, but Bokuto stayed optimistic. Akaashi on the other hand knew, that he was; not going to make it through this, but he wanted to stay strong for Bokuto, so he put on a happy mask. Soon though, everything slowly got worse, and Akaashi's mask cracked each time, until finally; it shattered.

_Turn away, 'Cause I'm awful just to see_

"Get out!" Akaashi yells at Bokuto, who was trying to get into the washroom, "No Akaashi! Let me in!" Bokuto yelled, trying to pry the door open. Finally, Bokuto breaks into the washroom, only to see Akaashi curled up into a ball in the corner, "Bokuto-san please, I look awful" he cries silently, Bokuto makes his way over and un-folds Akaashi, "No you don't" Bokuto cups his face "You look beautiful" and Akaashi grabs onto Bokuto and sobs.

_All my agony, Know that I will never marry_

Somedays Akaashi just sobs in pain, some he is even screaming because it is too much. Bokuto is always there to calm him down, to make it a little more bearable, and that means the world to Akaashi. It also reminds him how much he loves Bokuto, yet it always reminds him that soon, he'll be gone.

_I'm counting down the days to go_

"Bokuto-san" Akaashi whispers, "Yes Akaashi?" Bokuto asks, also whispering. Akaashi looks over to the window, "I don't want to die" he says, "You won't Akaashi" Bokuto says grabbing his hand "Not on my watch" and kisses it. Akaashi just hm's as he watches the rain trickle down the window, knowing death was inevitable.

_This just ain't livin', This just ain't livin'_

"Hey, Akaashi" Bokuto starts, "Yes Bokuto-san?" there is a long silence, "Can,I kiss you?" Bokuto looks up at Akaashi, who is startled.

_And I just hope you know,_

"You can," Akaashi whispers. 

_I will not kiss you_

Bokuto leans in, and pauses, "Are you sure?" Bokuto whispers, "Yes" and Akaashi leans in the rest of the way. He feels at home like he is meant to be with Bokuto, almost like a soulmate. "Woah," Bokuto says as he pulls away, Akaashi chuckles, "Woah indeed" they fall into a comfortable silence. "Boku-" he is cut off from his sentence, "Kōtarō," Bokuto says quickly, "Huh?" Akaashi says shocked by the use of the first name, "Soulmates call each other by their first names" Akaashi smiles at him "Keiji then." At this moment it's almost as if Akaashi is back on the court, with Kōtarō by his side, and all is good. Sadly though, nothing is forever like we think.

_If you say,_

Kōtarō is seen running into the hospital, sweat visible from practice. He had gotten a call from the hospital in the middle of it, nothing was specified, just that he needed to get there.

_Goodbye, today,_

He hears the beeping, the long beep of pending death, and his whole body fills with dread.

_I'll ask you to be true,_

Rushing to his lover's room, he sees all the nurses surrounding him, he can feel his throat aching from yelling. "Keiji! Please, don't leave me!"

_'Cause the hardest part of this is leaving you_

Death is inevitable, everyone knows this. The long beep, then the nothing, and suddenly your whole world crashes.

_Yes, the hardest part of this_

A sea of black, different people are there. Rivals, friends, teammates, family, everyone crying. Slowly everyone fades away, only for one to be left, as he crouches down to the grave.

"Rest well, Keiji."

_I will not kiss you_

"Thank you, Kōtarō"


End file.
